A wedding, a funeral, or a ceremony for a rite of passage, and a limousine glides quietly into view. A white one for a wedding, a black one for a funeral, or white one with a black top for a mixed blessing, such as a 40th birthday, or just an alcohol powered night on the town.

Most limousine passengers are ordinary people who are renting elegance by the hour, although their behavior may fall short of an elegant demeanor. More than a few bridesmaids and prom queens have been known to hike up their dresses, drop their panties and display a bad moon rising in an open window. The less daring ones only stand in the moon roof and bare their breasts.

As for young men, they generally do not put their buns or their breasts on display, but they often drink a lot and manifest other behavioral problems, such as throwing up, even though the standard limousine contract has a nausea clause to be signed by the responsible customer prior to the trip. Barf in the car and your credit card gets nicked for an additional $500 to $1500, depending on the company.

Nice people rent limousines, too, for anniversaries, parties, winery tours, or just for a night on the town, and not all limousines are of the stretched variety. Black SUVs worthy of the Secret Service are becoming part of the rolling stock, and the basic Lincoln Town Car seems to remain the industry standard. Executives use them so they can keep working while on the road, and not everyone wants a stretched limo anyway.

But you might. So come along for the ride. We’ll see the glittering lights of San Francisco at night, visit the wineries of the Napa Valley and the Sierra Nevada, and you’ll meet a lot of nice people, including some nudists. You will also meet some not-so-nice people. That’s a risk, but most risks have some appeal. Just come as you are. You don’t even have to buckle up.

MB